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Shepherds Bush Nun
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The
remarkable phenomenon of The Shepherds Bush Nun was first noted on
25th May 1999, when she sprinted past Nuncius Towers with
breathtaking speed and grace. Since then, her progress has been
carefully monitored from a hide, specially constructed in the shape
of a campanile so as not to arouse her suspicions and interfere with
her natural behaviour. The plans for the campanile were revealed on
uk.media.radio.archers
on 14th November 1999:
†
/ \
/ \
Campanile
| |
| |
| | ¤
| | /
\
| | / \ Viewing
space
| |/ \
| | |
| | |\
| | | \ Flying
buttress
| | |
/\ \
“This is a
cross section, showing the proposed utilisation of negative space to
emphasise the representation of nihilistic, millennial angst which
the Nun has done so much to contradict. The entire concept plays with
our notions of space-time - the campanile soaring like a pointing
finger toward the black holes of the universe, with the flying
buttress anchored firmly in primeval earth. The viewing space between
them is caught, like the human race, in the dialectical tension
between the ethereal and corporeal..... (cont.
p94)”
Many
hours of cold, patient waiting have finally produced a photograph -
taken in the early morning light of 27th February 2000. It
shows the nun in her winter plumage, with wimple demurely tucked into
a sensible waterproof which conceals the splendour of her habit. The
blurring has given rise to some scepticism: some maintain that it is
just a picture of a bin-liner and all a cruel hoax. Others put the
blurring down to quantum indeterminacy or poor light conditions. The
campanile is still fully manned, however, and incontrovertible
evidence of the Nun in full flight with wimple and habit flying is
still being sought. It will be a stirring sight.
Watch
this space…
Siderius
Nuncius
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News
New
photographs now available!
The
first two show the nun in pre-sprint ambling mode in summer and
winter plumage respectively. The third catches her in full sprint.
Our reporter admits, "She does actually shift at quite a pace,
so the focus isn't great and I mis-timed it - I was trying to catch
her between cars but there is a good flying wimple for umrats to
enjoy."
For
the curious among you we have also managed to acquire a rare shot of
Siderius Nuncius himself, seen here with
two-week-old Superniece.
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